Harry Potter, meet the tampon
by TeamEdwardxo46
Summary: Harry Potter and Ron Weasley are messing around in Ginny's room. They find a tampon. Meant to make you laugh, Hope you enjoy.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1. Harry's POV

I couldn't wait to leave Hogwarts and get to the Weasley's house for Christmas break. Quite frankly I needed to get away from OWL preparation. It was driving me insane. I couldn't wait to be able to sleep in, and not have to worry about anymore 16 page essays from Snape.

As Ron, Hermione, and I were boarding the Hogwarts express, I felt a rush of joy. We had our own cabin together, which was a huge benefit. Hermione instantly sat down and pulled out _Hogwarts, A History, _and started reading. Ron put his hands behind his head, and relaxed. I leaned my head against the window and watched the scenery go by.

When there was only a half an hour until we arrived at Kings Cross, Hermione closed her book. Ron looked over at her. I looked up too.

"I was in the library the other day, and I found something rather interesting." She said.

"In the library?" Ron asked"There's a shock"

"Never mind then if you don't want me to tell you!" Hermione said rolling her eyes.

No one spoke really until we arrived at the station. Mrs. Weasley wrapped each one of us in a hug. Including Ginny, Fred, and George.

Back at the Weasley house, everything was hectic. I decided that it would be best to proceed to Ron's room and drop off my stuff. Ron, Hermione, and Ginny followed me up the stairs. Ginny and Hermione turned into Ginny's room, while Ron and I went into his.

Once I unpacked my trunk I asked Ron,

"How is Ginny these days, she doesn't seem to be, you know, talking as much."

"Well I mean, the talking about you has certainly ceased….some." He replied.

I nodded. She did seem so different. But I tried not to let myself notice. Ron collapsed onto his bed, and put his hands over his eyes. I could tell he was tired too. He laid there for a while, and I wondered if he was asleep or not. I left him and went out into the hall.

On my way down the stairs I passed Hermione.

"Hey Hermione." I said.

"Oh, Hello Harry." She replied, then smiled. "How are you, lately you've been looking…concerned."

"Oh, no, no everything's fine, I've just been stressing, you know. OWLs."

_She knows I'm lying._ I thought to myself. But I knew Hermione well enough to know she would not pry.

"Alright, Harry, well let's go and help Molly with dinner." She suggested.

I followed her down the stairs, and then her and I helped Mrs. Weasley.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2. Ron's POV

Dinner was so good. After my nap, I would have eaten anything, but mom's food tasted amazing. Hermione and Ginny helped mom with the dishes. Fred and George were off exploding things in their room. So that left me and Harry to hang out in my room.

I sat on my bed, and Harry sat on the floor.

"So Harry, what do you want to do?" I asked him.

"Well, I mean I think it would be a good idea to get a start on the Charms essay that's due after break." He said.

_Oh no, He's turning into Hermione. This is Harry from Hell._ I thought.

"You mean the essay that Hermione already has finished?" I said.

"Yeah, I don't even have a clue what to write about." He said.

"Neither do I." I told him.

Just then I had a brilliant idea.

"Harry, I'm sure Hermione won't mind if we….borrowed…her essay to help us get ideas" I said.

Harry nodded then smiled. "but we have to go in there, get her essay, copy..I mean get ideas…and then put it back before she can know"

I nodded.

We quickly walked down the hall and into Ginny's room. Once in, we shut the door behind us.

"Now where would Hermione's essay be?" I wondered.

"Maybe in her trunk?" Harry said.

I walked over to Hermione's trunk on the floor. I was digging through it when Harry said.

"Ron, you have to see this."

I turned around and Harry was holding something white out in front of his face.

"What the bloody hell is this?!" I asked taking it from his hand.

_Where have I seen this before? _I asked myself. _OH yeah! Mom and Ginny use these things, Tampons! Yeah that's what their called._

"Um Harry, where did you get that?" I asked giving it back to him.

"Oh, I found it on Ginny's bed, there's some just sitting there" He said.

"Harry I don't think you want to play with that." I told him.

"Well why not?" He asked confused.

_Oh, he seriously doesn't know what it is._ I thought.

"Ron, what is this thing?!" He asked, angry now.

I couldn't hold it in anymore. The look on Harry's face was killer. The way he was holding the thing out in front of his face staring at it was the best part. I rolled around on the floor in a fit of laughter. I couldn't stop.

"RON! Tell me what this is!" He yelled.

"It's a ..it's a tampon!" I managed to spit out between fits of laughter.

"A what!?"

Harry was even more confused which made this all the more funny.

"Ron, please explain to me what this is. I seriously don't understand. It's just white! And what the heck is this string for?!" He asked, even more confused.

I was holding my aching sides. "Oh Harry, I'd tell you, but I don't want to, it's just too akward. Let's just say. It's girl material." I told him.

Harry rolled his eyes. Still holding the Tampon. He started swinging it back and forth in front of his face. This brought back the laughter.

Maybe it was the sound of me laughing that made her come upstairs. But Hermione did. She walked in to see me rolling on the floor laughing, and Harry holding the tampon up by his face. The look on her face, the way her brown eyes widened, oh god I wished I had a camera.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3. Hermione's POV

At first I thought it was a joke. I mean, why on Earth would Harry be playing with a tampon. But then I realized it was something different because Ron was rolling around, and Harry was wearing a look of frustration. I decided just to ask the simple question.

"Harry, why are you playing with a tampon?"

This sent Ron into a spazem of more laughter and gasps for air.

"Well, I found it on Ginny's bed, and Ron won't tell me what it is. I mean its white, and it was a string! Why wouldn't I be curious?"

I understood, he didn't know what it was. I watched Harry examine the tampon, when I saw his expressions as he played with the string, the laughter hit. At first it wasn't so bad. But then I kept looking at Harry, and the way he was turning it around in his palm, and he looked so angry! I couldn't stop. It wasn't long before I had joined Ron on the floor.

"Hermione please?" He pleaded.

I got a hold of myself. I brushed the hair away from my face and took a breath.

"Okay, I'm good." I said.

"Ron said this is _girl material_. You are a girl. I would like to know what the hell a _tampon_ is!"

He was shouting, and it took everything I had not to laugh. But I really did feel bad, he honestly had no clue.

"Okay Harry, it's complicated I guess." I honestly didn't want to tell him.

"Well, how about I just ask some questions about it then?" He suggested.

"Okay." this had to be better than explaining it head-on.

"Is it yours?"

"No, Harry."

"So its Ginny's then?" He looked a little surprised.

"Yes."

"Now please just tell me, what is so funny about this stupid thing?!"

Ron jumped in. "It's not that there's anything funny about it Harry. What's funny is the fact that you don't know what it is."

"Well I'll never know unless someone explains!" He was practically begging. "Hermione, you are like my sister, please just tell me what this does, and I won't ask for anything ever again."

I seriously didn't know what to do. Here was one of my best friends, asking me what a tampon was. I knew once he found out he would be totally disgusted, but it seemed like he really did want to know what it was.

"Hermione, is it you know, magical? Or does it somehow involve muggles?" Harry asked.

Ron laughed again. Not as hard. But a good laugh.

I wondered what was going through his mind. I thought I would give it a shot and ask. "Harry, well, what do _you_ think it is?"

"Well it looks like something to stop a nosebleed, or like a cat toy almost." He said.

This time I seriously couldn't help myself I started laughing and moments later Ron joined me. We were both on the floor falling over each other.

"Harry, maybe you should ask Molly." I suggested through giggles.

"You know what, I think I will! Being that you two are no help what- so -ever!" He yelled. And with that he stomped out of the room with Ron and I close behind, still laughing.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4. Ginny's POV.

I heard them laughing. They had been at it for a while. I desperately wanted to know what was so funny, but I knew Ron would yell. After all they were "Fifth Years". What-ever. I was sitting at the kitchen table, drinking some butterbeer when they came downstairs. Harry first and then Ron and Hermione, laughing their heads off.

"Come to share some of the funny?" I asked as they walked into the kitchen.

Harry was holding something in his hand, and he was staring down at it.

"Ginny, where's mom?" Ron asked.

"I don't know. Why?" I asked.

"Harry needs to ask her something" He said as him and Hermione started to laugh again.

"You know what I think I'll ask Ginny!" Harry said.

"Ask me what?" I said.

He held up the thing in his hand, walked towards me, and asked, "What is this?"

I could not believe it, Harry Potter, the love of my life, my whole reason for existing, was standing in my house, holding up one of_ my_ tampons, asking what it was.

I just stared at him; I could feel myself going red. Then I started to laugh. Harry put a hand on my shoulder. "Please don't laugh Ginny, I seriously need to know what this _tampon_ does, Ron and Hermione won't tell me."

I looked behind Harry, Ron and Hermione were still laughing.

"Well Harry." _ How on earth am I going to explain this!_ I thought.

"Maybe we should take this conversation else wear."

I grabbed his hand, the hand that didn't have the tampon in it, and lead him upstairs into my room. I shut the door and sat down on my bed.

"Okay Harry, where did you get this?" I asked taking it from his hand.

"On your bed." He replied.

"What were you doing in here?" I asked.

"Looking for Hermione's essay." He replied turning pink.

I sighed. "Harry, only girls use this, so you can't have it."

"I know Ron told me that, but only that, he wouldn't tell me anything else." He said. A look of frustration was taking over his face.

The poor guy seriously had no idea what a tampon was, I was on the verge of laughing, but I knew that would hurt his feelings.

"Alright, Harry, Do you know what the menstrual cycle is?" Totally Awkward.

"Yeah?" He said. "But what does that have to do with a tampon?"

I explained to him, in the most simple way, leaving out as many details as possible what a tampon was. His expressions changed a lot. Once he understood, he looked like he was going to be sick.

I fell over backwards onto my bed and started laughing. Harry sighed and left. That was just too funny. I wished that He would have asked my mom, that would have been priceless! _Some day, I'm going to write a book, all about Harry Potter and tampons._ I though.

I got up and went to find Harry. The first place I thought to look was Ron's room. When I opened the door Harry wasn't in there. Hermione and Ron were. They were both sitting on the floor, closer than usual, they were talking in hushed voices and seemed to be having a deep conversation. I felt sorry to interrupt. When Ron saw me in the doorway, he said.

"If you're looking for Harry, I'd check the bathroom, he ran past here, probably crying. Poor guy."

"Oh, Okay thanks Ron." I shut the door behind me and started walking down the hall towards the bathroom.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5. Harry's POV.

I had never been more embarrassed in my life. Not even Draco Malfoy could make me feel this way. How did Ron know about tampons and I didn't? I wished that Hermione could have been the one to tell me. When Ginny started to laugh, it made me feel, really stupid.

I was sitting in the back yard. I just needed to get away from laughter. I heard the back door open and watched Ginny come out and sit beside me on the porch swing.

"Harry, I'm sorry." She said.

I looked into her eyes; I could tell she meant it.

"It's okay, Thanks for actually telling me what it was though." I said.

"Yeah, sure thing" she said.

"You aren't ever going to let me forget this are you?" I asked.

She laughed. "Nope."

"Thought so."

"Well we should really be getting inside. It's getting late." She said as she stood up. She held out her hand to help me up. I took it and stood up.

I pulled her into a hug. The smell of her long red hair was enough to make me go berserk. I let go, not wanting to make things too awkward. She smiled and I held the door for her as we went inside.

Hermione and Ron were now sitting at the Kitchen table. Ron was holding his wand. Turning it over and over in his fingers. Hermione was just watching him. When Ginny and I came in, Ron smirked, and Hermione just smiled. I gave them the most dirty looks possible. Then Ron said,

"I can't wait 'til Fred and George hear about this one!" Ron said.

I rolled my eyes and sat down at the table with them. Ginny eyeballed the table and then went upstairs. I decided to follow her example.

"Goodnight guys, I'll see you tomorrow." I said as I got up from the table.

"Night," They said in unison.

As I walked away I could still hear Ron's laugh and Hermione's giggles.


	6. Epiloge

Epilogue

35 years later.

Ginny Potter was sitting on the sofa. Her daughter was by her side. Lilly Potter was laughing hysterically as her mother told her the funniest story she had ever heard.

Harry walked in to the living room to see what the laughter was about.

"So I had to explain to your father what it was! To think! Famous Harry Potter didn't even know what a tampon was!" Ginny was saying to Lilly.

At first Harry had no idea what his wife was talking about. But then Ginny continued. "His facial expressions were the best part! And he was playing with it too! He even thought it was a cat toy! Aunt Hermione laughed harder than anyone that night."

Then Harry understood. "GINNY!" He shouted.

"Yes?" Ginny called innocently over Lilly's laugh.

Harry walked into the living room to find his daughter holding her sides while she was laughing.

Harry rolled his eyes. _Here we go again._


End file.
